The First Day at ATC School

Ok, for those who don't know: I'm in Oklahoma City at the Federal Aviation Administration Academy, studying to become an Air Traffic Controller. When I finish school (sometime around September 23rd), I will move to Memphis, TN, and embark on an even longer, more intense training program to become a controller in Memphis. I've set up this blog to keep my friends and family informed about what I am doing here... sometimes I'll update it four or five days in a row, and there may be times I'll update it once a week. All depends on what there is to talk about and how exhausted I am. Also, there may be things I can't mention, so, we'll see. But really, this is for friends and family. Others are, of course, welcome to comment, but if you don't like the tone of this or find it offensive... I'm not sorry. The people this is intended for know me and like me despite my many, many faults.

As I am an FAA employee now, I have to represent them as well as possible - as such, I won't make any dirty comments or jokes and will keep the swearing to a minimum. Even still, I usually find a way to get my point across in peculiar ways even without those tools.

That being said, here is what I learned on Day 1 of Air Traffic Control, En Route, Basic school:

A. I get health insurance if I'm willing to give up half my paycheck, but for life insurance, I only have to spend per pay period what the average fat person spends for lunch at McDonald's.

B. We have a travel office to handle per diem and travel reimbursements, but the red tape makes the process go slower than the aforementioned fat person running a marathon.

C. I can't blatantly ask one of the girls in my class to have sex with me, or I'll get fired (and likely castrated by my wife, too, so, negativity all the way around there).

D. I can't call the black guy in my class any racial epithets that may or may not start with "n," or I'll get fired (besides, he's a good guy and my best friend here, so, not inclined to do that anyway).

E. I can't choke out anyone at work, or I'll get fired (and as one friend put it, that might be my toughest one on this list. I tend to agree).

F. Lots of people watch pornography on FAA computers. That's the only plausible reason I can come up with why they felt the need to mention this nine different times during the first day of training.

I want to sleep now, but quickly, some interesting notes about people in my class. Well over half are married, and 2/3 are going to California. Most of them flew here, but some of us drove.. I think I'm the third longest drive. One girl drove from the Bay Area here, and one guy in my class drove 30 freakin' hours - just from Anchorage, Alaska to Seattle. Then, ya know... the quick sprint from Seattle to Oklahoma City.

More on them later. It's almost 11, and I have to be awake in six and a half hours.

Comment away... talk to you soon.

Mitch